Save Me
by mantharella
Summary: My version of Twilight but it has some twists, like Bella has brain cancer and James never shows up. Full summery in chapter 3. Cannon Pairings.
1. The beginning

_**Authors Note: **_This is a plot bunny that wouldn't leave me alone. I had to write it down. For those of you that read my Harry Potter story I am planning to continue that and this story at the same time don't worry. So here it is. Oh and reviews will be hugged!!!!

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I am Isabella Swan and today is one of the worst days of my life. I could see the doctor standing in front of me with a pitying expression on his face and I could feel my mother gripping my hand like her life depended on it. I was in shock; I thought I was free of it. I mean I always knew that there was a chance of it coming back but I didn't think it would. I just found out that I had cancer . . . again.

Let me explain. When I was ten I was diagnosed with level three brain cancer and I had a fifty percent chance of living. After two years of chemotherapy and four surgeries, I was finally declared cured. We were told that there was a very high chance that it could come back and that I should be checked every year just to be careful.

I had been cancer free for five years and I didn't think it was going to come back, I mean this was just a normal check up. Now here I am being told it was back and worse than the last time. They thought I had a ten percent chance at living. It hit me then, this time I might not make it. This time it was a very real possibility that I wouldn't make it. The doctor was talking again. I needed to pull myself together. I took a deep breath and forced myself to listen.

"There is a clinical trial that you could try. The only problem is that the hospital that is doing it is in Forks." The doctor said. "Where?" I asked. I had never heard of it before. "It's a small town in Washington. If you agree to it I could sign you up for it but you would have to find somewhere to live." The doctor told me. I looked over at my mother who was pale. "Could you give us a few minutes?" I asked politely. "Of course," responded the doctor before leaving the room.

I turned to my mother. Quickly she pulled me into a hug. "Oh honey, it's going to be okay. You made it though once, we can do this again." She pulled away from me. "Mom I want to do the clinical trial." I said, after a moment of silence. "If you want, it's okay with me. This is your decision." My mom, Renee, replied with tears in her eyes. I nodded my head determined.

I got up, walked to the door and opened it. The doctor was waiting outside. "Can you come in, please?" I asked, holding the door open. He nodded before walking in. "Have you decided yet?" I nodded my head. "I would like to do the clinical trial." I said determination in my voice and thoughts.

The doctor handed my mother a clipboard. "If you could sign at the bottom, she is a minor meaning that we need permission from the parent or guardian." The doctor explained to my mother kindly. Sighing deeply, my mother nodded, remembering all the surgeries that she had to sign paperwork for.

ooOOoo

It had been two weeks since I was told I had brain cancer again and now that I knew everything clicked into place. All of supposed stomach viruses and seemingly meaningless headaches that I have had last couple of months were all explained by the brain cancer. Right now though we were packing the last boxes to leave. My mom had found a house in the small town of Forks, Washington and we were moving this weekend. The clinical trial didn't start for another two months but we wanted to be there early to get used to the town.

In a way I was somewhat happy we were moving. I had told my friends at school that I had brain cancer and everywhere I went I got looks of pity. I wouldn't miss the looks or the whispers that followed me. I was starting off fresh. No one would have to know I had brain cancer at my new school. I wouldn't need to tell anyone. If someone asked why I was missing class I could pass it off as being sick or something, as long as I didn't pass out or lose my hair like I did last time I was sick no one would have to know. I knew that was a very slim chance but a girl can dream can't she.

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_**Authors Note: **_So there is the first chapter tell me what you think please!!! Love you all, Kate.


	2. First Meeting

_**Authors Note**_: The second chapter has arrived. Enjoy.

_**Dis-Claim-Her:**_ I forgot to put one up last chapter. I am obviously not SM though otherwise I would publish this and get paid instead of posting it on here and not getting paid. Oh well.

I want to dedicate this chapter to **april93** for being the first to review my new story.

**_AN2:_** Update posted on 8/21/09: Sorry I just was reading over this chapter and realized that I never explained how Jasper and Rose where related. You obviously know from the books what they say but still... I don't like leaving plot wholes in my story and it was annoying my. I'll put in bold what I changed.

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I sat with my mom in the waiting room of my new high school. We were waiting to talk to the Principle of the school, Mrs. Raymond, so that we could explain the situation in advance. Finally after what seemed like hours the secretary told we could go back. We walked into Mrs. Raymond's office and my mom and I shook her hand.

After we were seated Mrs. Raymond got straight to the point. "Is there a reason why you needed to meet with me Ms. Swan?" My mom looked at me, questioning with her eyes if I wanted to explain myself. Sighing I responded. "Mrs. Raymond my mom and I wanted to inform you of our situation, or rather my situation." "Situation?" Mrs. Raymond asked, puzzled. I nodded. "You see I will be missing a lot of school because I have been diagnosed with level three brain cancer. We moved here to try a clinical trial. I don't want the whole school to know but if you could inform my teachers so that when I am out I will have my work it would be helpful."

For a moment Mrs. Raymond blinked at me shocked. "Of course. I will inform your teachers immediately and will make sure that they don't breathe a word of it to our students. Oh and if you are ever feeling poor just inform the nurse and we will let you go home no questions asked. If there is nothing else I will go inform the teachers and nurse immediately of the situation." Mrs. Raymond said as she recovered from her shock. My mother nodded before she and I stood up and left, Mrs. Raymond close behind.

Outside of the waiting room I could see that people had started to arrive for school. My mom turned to me before hugging me tightly. "I'll see you when you get home." She said before leaving for her car. We had driven separately. I took a deep calming breath, and rolled my shoulders back before heading out of the waiting room towards my first class of the day.

I found my class easily enough and walked in. I had American History first thing in the morning. I walked up to the teacher and could see that his name was Mr. Don by the name plate on his desk. Clearing my throat to get his attention I introduced myself. "Hi, I'm Bella Swan, the new student. I was just wondering if I could know where my seat is, please." Mr. Don looked up and I could tell he recognized my name and then I saw the pity in his eyes before he spoke. "Ahh, yes Ms. Swan. Your seat is the fourth seat in the fifth row and here is you text book." "Thank you." I mumbled, hating the pitying look in his eyes, before walking to my seat.

Soon enough people started coming in, immediately noticing the new girl. Finally the bell rang and class started. Mr. Don cleared his throat gaining the classes attention. "Class I would like to introduce the new student in the class room, Isabella Swan. She has moved her from Phoenix, Arizona. I expect you to welcome her." He said sternly. I slid down in my seat a blush heating my face and the whole class turned to look at me.

The class passed slowly. I had always found history boring. After what seemed like eternity the bell rang signaling the end of class. I gathered my books and stood up. I bumped into someone. "Oh sorry," I said looking up, "I wasn't watching where I was going."

I had bumped into a boy with blondish hair that was just a little taller than me. He smiled at me. "No problem. I'm Mike, you're Isabella right?" "Bella, I go by Bella." I corrected him. "So, Bella what is your next class?" He asked trying to be cool. I rolled my eyes but he was the first to speak to me so I was civil to him. "I have English next." I said consulting my schedule. His face lit up. "What a surprise so do I. Want to walk to class together?" Knowing I couldn't escape, I nodded my head, following him out the door to next class.

English class passed by quickly. When the bell rang Mike came over this time he had a girl with brown wavy hair with him. "Hey Bella. I just wanted to introduce you to Jessica. Jessica this is Bella. Bella this is Jessica."Mike said. "Hi Bella! It's so nice to meet you."Jessica said with what was obviously fake enthusiasm.

I sighed inwardly. These people where so fake and superficial. I would continue to hang out with them though because I didn't know anyone else as of now. Fortunately Mike didn't have my next class. Unfortunately, Jessica did. Finally lunch time arrived. I grabbed an apple to eat from the line and was pulled over to a table by Jessica.

I listened to the conversations around me without any interest. I tried to look on the bright side of things. For one I felt normal right now, no headaches or nausea, always a good thing. And at least I wasn't sitting alone like a complete dork. I took a bite out of my apple. That's when I saw _them_.

I almost chocked on my bite of apple. I quickly swallowed. "Who are _they_?" I asked Jessica. Jessica immediately saw who I was looking at. "Oh, that's the Cullen's. Dr. and Mrs. Cullen adopted all these kids before they moved here. They are all like together. Like really _together_. Isn't that like illegal or something?"Jessica said. "Jess they are not really related." The girl next to her said. "**Jasper and Rosalie are twins but whatever.**Anyway, Rosalie, the blonde one is with Emmet, the really muscular one. Then, Alice, the short one is with Jasper, the one who looks like he is in pain. And Edward is single; apparently no one here is good enough for him. Like I care." Jessica said with an obviously fake laugh.

I was looking at the Cullen's the whole time Jessica was talking. I was a very observant person and I noticed that Edward's lips twitched when Jessica was talking about him, almost as if he could hear what she was saying. But that was impossible … right? I mean logically he couldn't hear us as he was on the other side of the cafeteria but there was something that wasn't right about them. If they were all foster children unrelated, with the exception of Rosalie and Jasper, how come they all looked alike? They all had the same shade of pale skin, almost the same eye color as each other, and they were all unbelievably gorgeous. Something was going on and I didn't like unsolved mysteries.

I was broke out of my thought process by Mike who was asking me something. I shook myself out of my thoughts. "Sorry, Mike. What did you say?" I asked politely. "I was wondering if you were ready to go to your next class. I thought I would walk with you since we have the same class."Mike said with a goofy smile. I inwardly grimaced; Mike was starting to annoy me with his hovering. "Sure Mike." I forced myself to say nicely.

I threw what was left of my apple away before walking to Biology with Mike. I walked in and immediately went to ask where my seat was. After finding out where I was to be seated and getting my text book from the teacher, Mr. Banner. I turned around took look for my seat and then I saw _him_.

That's right my seat was right next to Edward Cullen, in the very back row. To make it all better I was starting to get nauseous. Stupid brain cancer, I grumbled inwardly. I walked to my seat and sank into the seat trying not to throw up. I took deep breaths threw my nose. I could see from my peripheral vision that Edward had stiffened next to me clenching him hands into fists.

I was too nauseous to care at this moment though. Finally, when I knew I wasn't going to throw up if I moved, I turned to look at him. He had an expression of murderous fury on his face as he looked at me. I frowned back at him. That seemed to startle him for a moment before he turned his back on me to look at out the window with the same stiff posture and clenched fists.

What had I done to him? I asked myself starting to get mad. He had no right to act that way towards me. If I had done something to him, which I hadn't, then what could I have done to spur that amount of fury from him? I was wrapped up in my thoughts the entire Biology class. I had a massive headache right now and I knew I wasn't going to get thru the day. I needed to get home. How to get rid of Mike?

When the bell rang, Edward all but ran out of the class room and again I frowned after him. I stood slowly my head throbbing. I was sure that I looked pale and sure enough my thoughts where confirmed by Mike. "Bella, you okay? You look really pale."Mike asked. "I'll be fine Mike," _Hopefully_ I added in my thoughts before continuing, "I think I'm going to go to the nurse though." "You want me to take you?"Mike asked, hovering again. "NO!" I all but shouted at him. "No, I know where it is, I'll be fine." Mike nodded before walking away.

I walked quickly to the nurse's office. I told her who I was and she immediately told me I could go home. I thanked her before going to my car. In spite of my costly treatment, my mom and I were in fact very well off. My dad was a billionaire before he was killed in a car crash leaving all his money to me and my mother. My mother worked to keep herself busy and my mom and I didn't think very much of material possessions. My car was my one indulgence. I liked to go fast. I figured if I could go fast enough I could leave my problems behind if only for a little while. I had a blood red convertible mustang. It was my baby. I quickly got in before heading home. I needed to sleep my headache off.

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_**Authors Note:**_ There it is. REVIEW PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE!!!!!!!!!!


	3. Bad News

_**Authors Note:**_ Here is the next chapter. Enjoy.

_**Dis-Claim-Her:**_ I don't own and I'm not SM. Oh well.

**Full Summery:** Isabella Swan, known as Bella was just told she had brain cancer. . . again. With the possibility of death to close for comfort Bella decides to try a clinical trial in Forks, Washington. That is when she meets , who is running the trial, and his family. She knows that they are hinding a secret, one that she wants to find out. Will Bella want to know the secret once she figures it out or will she see their secret as her way out?

I dedicate this to **DanielWhite **who reviewed the last chapter. Love you!

Today's chapter was inspired by these songs.

**I Caught Myself – Paramore**

**Spotlight (Twilight Mix) –Mute Math**

**Bella's Lullaby- Carter Burwell**

**Never Think – Rob Pattinson **

**Tremble For My Beloved- Collective Soul**

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**Save Me**

**Chapter 3**

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I woke up the next morning to the sound of my mother's voice. "Baby, you have to get up. We have to go to the hospital to meet the doctor doing the trial and get some tests done."My mom whispered to me softly. I groaned and burrowed under the sheets, not wanting to get up. "Come on get up." My mother said louder before yanking the sheets off me taking them with her down stairs. "Fine!" I huffed.

I got up slowly and went through my normal morning routine. I walked down the stairs to find my mom. She was sitting at the kitchen table, reading a news paper, waiting for me to come down. "Ready to go?" She asked once she saw me. "Aren't we going to eat breakfast?" I asked puzzled. My mom shook her head. "You know you can't have anything to eat before you have a blood test." I groaned. I had forgotten I would also be getting a blood test today. "Can we at least drive separately?" I asked. Sighing my mother nodded. I quickly grabbed my keys before heading out.

I sighed in content as the engine to my baby purred to life. I quickly backed out of the drive way. Then I was speeding towards the hospital. I kept accelerating, trying to, for just a moment, leave my troubles behind. 60, 70,80,90,95. I kept going faster and faster. I turned my stereo up. I just wanted to forget; couldn't I at least have that?

At last I pulled into a parking space in the hospital parking lot. I got out of my car and leaned on it waiting for my mother. After what seemed like hours she finally pulled in a couple of spaces away from me.

We walked in together; I was hoping that no one from school was here to see me. I didn't want to have explain why I was here. We made it to the front desk without seeing anyone I knew and I sighed in relief. My mom was asking where we should go first to get my brain scan or to get my blood test. I wasn't really paying any attention. Then nausea hit me suddenly. I gasped trying not to throw up all over the floor. I breathed deeply through my nose because if I opened y mouth I was going to throw up.

My mom started walking toward an elevator so I followed. She pressed the button for the second floor and the elevator doors slid closed. She then turned to look at me with a concerned frown. "Honey you okay?" Took a deep breath and when I knew I wasn't going to immediately throw up I spoke. In a tight voice, enunciating each word clearly I said, "I'll be fine." My mom didn't look like she was convinced but she let it drop knowing that I wasn't going to tell her.

The doors to the elevator opened and my mom lead me through the hallways to a waiting room. She went and signed me in before coming to sit with me. I had my head between my knees trying to settle my stomach. I was sure that my mom had figured out at this point what was going on. She rubbed m back soothingly.

The person behind the desk called my name telling me I could go back. I stood carefully and walked back. I had no idea if I was getting my scan done or my blood. When the lady led me back to a chair I figured out that I was getting my blood done. I sat down in the chair. I was too used to this routine for my own comfort.

As she was getting everything set up the lady tried to make small talk with me. "So have you ever had your blood taken before?" I nodded my head still not sure if I could talk without throwing up. Having my blood taken never took long and this time was not any different. I walked back to the waiting room. The nausea was starting to fade.

"Where to next?" I asked. "Brain scan and then a meeting with the doctor in charge of the clinical trial." My mom said factually. I nodded my head, before following her again to the elevators. When the elevator we were in started to move my mom again asked if I was okay. "Much better." I said truthfully. The nausea was almost gone. The brain scan went by without any problems. Then we were off to the meeting. Conveniently the doctor's office was on the same floor.

My mom found the door to his office and knocked. That is when I saw the plaque next to the door. I gasped and stopped breathing. The plaque read: Office of Dr. Carlisle Cullen. _Cullen._ My doctor was Dr. _Cullen_, whose son hates me for no apparent reason. The word Cullen kept repeating in my brain. Then the thought that Dr. Cullen might not let me into the trial and that I might die came to my brain. What would I do then? I stood there frozen eyes wide, palms sweating, and heart racing not registering anything around me.

Then I was sitting and I could hear two voices talking around me and something cold pressed against my back. The shock of the cold forced me to take in a lung full of air. Then I was breathing again, my heart slowing down. _Think rationally!_ I commanded myself. Dr. Cullen would let me into the trial; he wouldn't let someone die because of something petty. After all he took an oath and it was against the law to break that oath. It was going to be okay.

I then concentrated on slowing my heart down and getting my breathing under control. Finally I could make out the voices around me or rather voice. "Bella? Bella are you okay?" Someone was asking me. I didn't recognize the voice. I realized my eyes were closed and I snapped them open. My eyes focused on someone kneeling down in front of me. It was a man with pale skin, amber eyes, blonde hair and unbelievably handsome features. I realized that this must be Dr. Cullen.

I slowly found my voice and answered his question. "Yes, yes I'm fine." I said somewhat shakily. He nodded. "Good. Do you know what happened to you Bella?" I shook my head no. That had never happened to me before. "Bella, you were having a panic attack. Do you know what could have caused that?" "No, not at all." I said lying through my teeth. Dr. Cullen 'hmmm'ed, obviously not believing me but letting it drop.

I looked around his office and noticed that my mom wasn't here. "Where is my mom?" I asked curiously. "I sent her down to the cafeteria to get you something to eat with sugar. Something to eat after a panic attack usually helps. We can go ahead and get started with meeting if you would like." Dr. Cullen said with a kind smile. "Can we. Get started on the meeting, I mean." "Of course." He said.

He walked over picking up a file that was obviously mine. He took out what looked like x-rays but what I knew where my brain scans. He hung them and then flipped on the backlight. He inspected them but from where I was sitting I could see my brain tumors from here and I knew that it was worse than I thought it was. I might not be a level three like they thought I was. If I was level four that meant I didn't qualify for the clinical trial. I had no idea what would happen if I didn't qualify.

Slowly Dr. Cullen turned to me. He had a saddened expression on his face. I had seen this expression many times in my life. When my mom told me my dad died, when I was told I had cancer the first time, when I was told they couldn't remove the whole tumor and that I would have to be stuck in the hospital longer, when I was told I had cancer the second time. The list went on and on.

I closed my eyes. "I don't qualify for the trial, do I?" I asked eyes still closed. "No." Dr. Cullen whispered but I still heard him. "I'm a level four aren't I?"I said with my eyes still closed. "Yes." Dr. Cullen whispered sounding like he wished he could say no. "I don't have a very good chance at living do I?" I forced myself to ask, eyes still closed tight. I needed to know. "It doesn't look good for you." He said again sounding like he wished he could take it back. "I know." I whispered. And I did know; I could feel it.

I still had my eyes closed. If I closed my eyes I could pretend this wasn't happening. I could pretend that I might not be dying. I was suddenly very glad that my mom wasn't here right now. "Bella?" Dr. Cullen asked. I finally opened my eyes and looked at him. "Yes." I whispered. I couldn't find any energy to put into talking right now. "Bella, if you want, I will be your doctor."He told me, with that sad expression still on his face. "Would you please?" I asked. He nodded, assuring me that he would.

Suddenly a knock sounded on his door. "Come in." He called. I turned to see who was coming in. My mom walked through the door doughnut in hand. "Bella! Here I got. . . "She trailed off seeing my expression. She then looked at Dr. Cullen and saw his expression. Quickly she looked over his shoulder to my scans hanging on the wall. She dropped the doughnut not seeming to care. "Oh God." She whispered, tears in her eyes. "Oh God, no. No, no, no, no." She whispered tears running down her cheeks. "Please tell me it's not what I think it is."

I could feel the tears running down my face as I shook my head and I closed my eyes in sorrow. "Oh Bella." My mom said rushing over to hug me close to her. She knelt down beside me and rocked me back and forth as we cried silently. My mom knew that my chance of living before had not been good, now she knew my chance at living was slim to none.

Finally I pulled myself together and pulled away from her hug. I wiped my eyes. "Mom, Dr. Cullen has agreed to still be my doctor and I trust him."I said my voice thick. "Whatever you want Bella. Whatever you want." She said still wiping her eyes. I turned to look at Dr. Cullen. "Can we meet again later this week? To discuss tre-treatment options?" I asked, stuttering of the word treatment. "Of course. I don't have any meetings on Friday and it gives me the week to look over your scans and blood work and figure out the best thing for you." He said solemnly. "Thank you." My mom whispered.

I stood up and we walked out of his office. I grabbed my keys out of my pocket. "Call the school. Tell them I won't be in today. I don't know what time I'll be home. Don't wait up for me." I said. I saw my mom nod in understanding before I jogged down the hall and towards my car. I got in and started it before peeling out of the parking lot.

I didn't know where I was going; all I knew is that I needed to drive fast. I pushed my car to its limits. As I was passing the sign that told me I was now leaving Forks I checked my rearview mirror and I could have sworn that a black Mercedes and silver Volvo were following me before they turned off onto a trial in the woods. I still felt like I was being followed though so I pushed my car even farther. I needed to get away. I needed to be as far away as I could from the place where my life had been ruined. I just needed to get away from my problems for once in my life.

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_**Authors Note:**_ So there it is. Now that I read it back it is kind of depressing. Oh well. Review please.


	4. Confrontations

_**Authors Note: **_Here it is!!! I have to hurry up because I am missing American Idol!

I don't own Twilight and I'm not SM

Thank you to all my reviewers.

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I don't know what time I finally got home the night before but I do know that it was some time after three in the morning. Nevertheless I got up and went to school the next day. I pulled into the high school parking lot early. I didn't feel like talking to anyone so I just sat in my car and turned my stereo up and sung along with the music.

When I saw I had five minutes until the tardy bell rang I got out of my car and went to my first class barely making it on time. I could see that Mike was looking at me concernedly but I ignored him. I didn't feel like talking to anyone.

Time passed in a blur. Before I knew it lunch had arrived, I didn't even bother going into the cafeteria, I wasn't hungry and I just wanted to be alone with my thoughts. All that was going through my head was that I couldn't die. I couldn't leave my mother alone in this world, I was all she had.

I left my car and went to Biology. When I arrived I was the only one there so I quickly took my seat and laid my head down on the desk. Soon enough I heard the door open again but I didn't look up to see who it was, I didn't really care. It was a shock when a voice next to me greeted me. "Hello." The voice said quietly. My head shot up and looked around. That is when I realized that Edward Cullen was the one that spoke.

I frowned at him puzzled. Why was he suddenly talking to me? "Hello?" I said but it came out sounding more like a question. "I'm Edward Cullen and you must be Isabella Swan."He said still in a quiet voice like we were in a library or something. "I go by Bella." I corrected him. "So, Bella, do you want to tell me why you were in my dad's office and then ran away with tears in your eyes or am I going to have to ask my dad?" Edward said cutting straight to the point.

I paled and clutched the desk hard, my breathing becoming labored. He had seen me at the hospital. More specifically he had seen me leaving his dad's office and his dad is a neurosurgeon. And surely Edward would know that his dad is doing a clinical trial and what the requirements were. "What are you talking about Edward?" I whispered unconvincingly.

"You know exactly what I am talking about. So your mom has cancer does she?" He said. I sighed out in relief. He didn't know or even think that I was the one with cancer. No one knew yet, that was a good thing. "No my mom doesn't have cancer." I said the relief evident in my voice. "So your dad is the one with the cancer then?" He asked. Why was he so curious?

"My dad is dead." I said flatly my mind going to the night that it happened. NO! I cut off the thought process. It was best not to relive that particular memory. I brought myself to the present and saw that Edward was frowning at me. "You're not going to tell me why you were in my dad's office are you?" Edward asked. "Nope." I said somewhat smugly. Edward nodded and turned to face the front of the room. I did the same glad that the conversation was over.

Biology passed quickly and uneventfully. The bell rang and I was off to gym. I dressed out quickly and went to sit in the stands. After roll was called it was announced that we would be running the mile today. I just shrugged and started stretching. A mile was nothing I could run four in a day. Running was like driving my car. If I could run faster and farther maybe I could out run my problems. It was easy to say that I was in good shape by now. We walked out to the track and the coach blew the whistle. I started running, quickly leaving the other people behind.

I was the first done beating the second person by a good two minutes. My coach pulled my over. "Swan, you're a good runner. Have you considered trying out for track this spring?" I had and then I got cancer. I knew by the time spring rolled around I would lucky to be out of the hospital and walking let alone running. "I can't. Sorry Coach." I said before walking away.

Coach let us in early and I dressed back in quickly before throwing my hair up in a messy ponytail. How long would I have my hair? I thought before quickly dismissing it from my mind. I would deal with it when it happened. The final bell rang and I went to my car.

I got in turned it on and sat for a while letting the first rush of cars go. I didn't really want to go home yet so I called my mom telling her I wasn't going to be home any time soon. I planned on just driving around town. I put my seat belt on and looked into my rearview mirror about to back out. That is when I saw the strangest thing.

All of the Cullen's where leaning on the silver Volvo and they were all staring at the same thing. I looked around me seeing if there was another can next to me. Seeing that there wasn't I realized that they were all looking at me. I took a deep breath turned my car off and got out. I started to walk slowly over to them my vision starting to blur. I blinked refocusing my eyes.

I walked until I was standing in front of them. By this time the parking lot was almost empty. I made eye contact with all of them noting the similarities in their eye colors. "Yes?" I asked tightly somewhat annoyed. What was their problem and what secret were they hiding?

"We want to know why you were at the hospital and why our dad has taken special interest in whatever case you are involved in. He doesn't ever do this. He does clinical trials and that's it. What is going on?" Edward asked seriously. I paled for the second time that day and my breathing stopped for a minute. Then I took a deep breath blinking my vision was starting again.

"I could ask you the same thing couldn't I Edward?" I said fiercely. "I don't know what you are talking about." Edward said stiffly. His family crossed their arms as one. I narrowed my eyes in suspicion. "I think you do. Care to explain why you and your family have so many characteristics in common when you are not really related, with the exception of Rosalie and Jasper? Why do you all have the same shade of pale skin and the same color of amber eyes that get darker every day and why don't I ever see you eating any food? Do tell." I said rapidly.

I could hear that almost all of them gasped behind him but Edward stayed silent. "Don't change the subject, Bella. Why were you at the hospital?" Edward said forcefully. That was all it took. I snapped. I couldn't take the weight of the stress and his pressing questions.

"You really want to know?" I asked my resolve broken. Edward, Alice, Rosalie, Jasper, and Emmet all nodded. "Fine." I said before I started pacing back and forth. "This is somewhat of a long story." I warned before I started. "Best start at the beginning." I mumbled under my breath before continuing. "I was ten when I was told that I had level three brain cancer. It was two years before I was declared cured. I was told to be checked every year and that there was a strong possibility of it coming back. I have been cancer free for five years. Or maybe I say I had been cancer free for five years." I said as an afterthought as I stopped pacing for a moment.

I shrugged before I started pacing again. "Anyways, a couple of weeks ago I was told that I had brain cancer again, worse than before but still a level three and that a clinical trial was going on in Forks. So my mom and I moved here."

I stopped pacing again as my vision blurred. I ignored it and continued with my story. "I went in yesterday to have some tests done to make sure that I qualified for the trial. At that point the trial was my best and probably only chance of survival that I knew of. Sure enough my tests got back and I-" I cut off abruptly. I hadn't said this allowed to anyone other than Dr. Cullen as of now. If I said it out loud it only made it truer.

"You what?" The silence was broken by Alice, the little pixy looking girl. I looked up into the sky unable to look at them as a few stray tears fell down my face. "I don't qualify for the trial. I'm a level four with a less than five percent chance at living." I whispered. I laughed grimly at the unfairness of it all before I angrily whipped the tears off my face.

There was complete silence while I pulled myself together. "My mother is optimistic. She thinks that I will make it through like I did last time. It doesn't feel like it did last time though. Last time I could feel in my heart that I was going to be okay. This time is different. I feel it coming." I said solemnly still not looking at them. I didn't want to see their pity. My vision was blurring again but I passed it off as tears.

"Feel what coming?" Emmet's deep voice rumbled. "Death." I whispered simply. "I'm dying. Plain and simple, I'm dying and leaving my mother alone in the world and there is nothing anyone can do about it." Then suddenly my vision blurred to an extreme and I started to lose my balance. The pieces clicked into place then. I was going to pass out. Stupid brain cancer symptoms! I screamed in my head."Bella? Bella, are you okay?" Jasper asked worriedly. I gasped as my head started to swim and the breath felt like it was being forced out of me. "Help. Get help fast." I gasped out. I heard someone shout out my name concernedly before I was falling into the warn comforting blackness.

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_**Authors Note: **_Oh no!!!! What will happen? Review please!!!


	5. Waking Up

**_Authors Note:_** I'm so sorry that this took me loger than usual but I had a minor family emergency. Everyone in my family is fine now though and I finally had a chance to write. So here it is.

**_Dis-Cliam-Her:_**Honestly if I was SM and I owned Twilight do you honestly think I would be writing on Fanfiction. I don't think so.

**_ Dedication:_**To all my lovely reviewers I have one thing to say to you : YOU ROCK!!!!!!!

Playlist: (I felt like listening to classical if you can't tell.)

**River Flows in You - Yiruma**

**Kiss the Rain - Yiruma**

**Bella's Lullaby - Carter Burwell**

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**Save Me**

**Chapter 5**

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_Beep. Beep. Beep_

The annoying beeping seemed to throb almost in perfect synchronization with the throbbing in my head. I wondered why there was anything throbbing at all. It sounded so familiar. Then I realized where I had heard it before. I heard the same beeping every time I woke up from a surgery. But that didn't sound right; I hadn't even had my second appointment with Dr .Cullen yet. So why was I hearing the heart monitor?

The memory came back in pieces. I remembered breaking down and telling the Cullen's about my cancer. Then I remembered my vision blurring and gasping for someone to get help. I furrowed my brow in confusion my eyes closed trying to figure this out. Then I remember blackness. There was something on the edge of my thoughts; I concentrated trying to remember till it came to me. Finally I remembered hearing an ambulance and voices that sounded so far away and I couldn't make out what they were saying.

Finally I opened my eyes. I squinted me eyes, the glaring white of the hospital wall hurting my eyes after being closed for so long. I looked around me. I saw that my mom was sitting in a chair next me asleep; she looked fatigued so I decided not to wake her. Looking around some more I was startled to find that my mother wasn't the only one in the room. All of the Cullen's were standing in a corner together. And I mean all of them, Dr. Cullen, Edward, Alice, Jasper, Rosalie, Emmet, and one I didn't recognize. I would guess that she was Mrs. Cullen.

None of them seemed to notice that I was a wake yet. They were all standing in a tight circle murmuring in soft voices. I tried to sit up a bit and groaned laying back down when my head increased in its throbbing. Immediately all of the Cullen's heads snapped around to look at me. Dr. Cullen rushed over to me. "Bella, glad to see you are awake." He said with a smile. All I could do was moan in response as the annoying beeping of the heart monitor made my head throb more.

Dr. Cullen frowned down at me concerned. "Bella what's wrong?" He asked immediately. "Can't we turn off the stupid heart monitor it's making my head worse." I asked hoarsely. I frowned, how long had I been out. Looking relieved Dr. Cullen nodded and turned off the sound on the heart monitor. I sighed, my head throbbing receding somewhat. Now to get down to the questions.

I cleared my throat. "How long was I out?" I asked. "Quite some time Bella. About roughly three days." Dr. Cullen said calmly. "Three days!" I whisperer yelled, I didn't want to wake my mom. Dr. Cullen nodded. "Why was I out so long? More importantly why did I pass out? Last time I only passed out when the cancer reached my . . ." I trailed off. Oh no.

"Bella I have some bad news. Well, more bad news." Dr. Cullen said reluctantly. _Oh no, no this is not happening_, I thought to myself. "Bella it seems that there is even more of the cancer than we thought. While you were unconscious I took some more scans and I don't know how we missed it." He said the last part as if he were blaming himself for the mistake.

"How much and were." I whispered afraid to know the answer but also afraid not to know. "Bella you have tumors in your Temporal lobe, Cerebellum and your Brain Stem." Dr. Cullen said gently. "I'm dying." It wasn't a question. He answered anyways. "Bella, I promise you I am going to do everything in my power to keep you alive. I won't let you die without a fight. Bella I want you to fight." Dr. Cullen said fiercely. I believed him and then to my shock I heard Edward speak. "I want you to fight too." He said softly. "I second that." Alice said raising her hand as if she were voting on it.

Then as if a chain reaction had been started every member of the Cullen family told me that they wanted me to fight. Tears filled my eyes as these people who I barely knew told me they wanted me to fight. I quickly wiped my eyes. "Thank you." I whispered. That is the exact moment my mom woke up. "BELLA!!" She screamed before jumping out of her chair to hug me. I looked over at the Cullen family and rolled my eyes. I could see them trying to stifle their laughter. "Hello to you too mom." I said.

"Now, you need sleep. I would probably be able to see those bags under your eyes a mile away." I said. "But-" My mom started. I cut her off. "I am perfectly fine and in one piece. Now you turn your little booty around walk to the car drive home and sleep! Do you understand? S-L-E-E-P." I commanded her. Seeing that I wasn't going to budge my mom nodded before giving me one last hug and going home.

I returned my gaze to the Cullen's. They were all looking at me with something akin to shock. "What?" I asked somewhat defensively. "Bella, you just woke up from a three day long coma like state and you convinced your worried mother to leave you here alone to go home and sleep." Edward said somewhat exasperated.

"So? It's not like you should care anyway Edward. I mean you have only known me for what like three days? One of those days you hated me for no reason, one day I wasn't there and the other day you interrogated me until I snapped and told you what was wrong!" I snapped at him glaring. "And don't think I forgot about the unanswered questions. Like what you are." I hissed at him glaring.

Dr. Cullen and Mrs. Cullen stiffened obviously not having heard about my suspicions while the others shifted a bit nervously. "Bella, don't you mean who I am not what I am?" Edward asked trying to sound casual. "No, I meant what I said. _What_ are you? Not only you but _what_ are your family? If none of you are related, with the exception of course," I said nodding to Rosalie and Jasper, "then why are you so alike? All of you with your pale skin, amber eyes, and unreal gorgeous features?"

All of them stood completely still. "There is a reason I sent my mom home and it wasn't because she needed sleep. It was because I want answers." I said making eye contact with each of them. "If you would excuse us for a minute I would like to speak to my family privately?" Dr. Cullen said snapping out of his trance. "Of course." I said politely. Dr. Cullen walked out of the room his family following him. So I waited wondering if I would get my answers.

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**_Authors Note:_**Sorry for any grammatical or spelling errors but i don't have a beta read and English is not really my best subject so if you see and feel free to point them out. Oh and REVIEW PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE!!! Yes I am begging.


	6. Family Talk

_**Note:**_ Hi. You all might know me if you read Kate's (mantharella's) profile. I'm her roommate Ginger. She left me a note saying that she wanted me to post this for her. I don't know if she told you this but she is trying to get into a summer studies program over in like North Carolina, so she had to go do some research for a paper she has to write to get in. Anyways that's why I'm posting. No I didn't write this Kate did. I'm just going to do what her note said.

First she said to do this. Don't know why. Disclaimer: Not SM. (shrugs) Whatever that means.

Oh! Before I forget she told me to dedicate this to : Anyone who has reviewed!!

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**Edward's POV**

I followed Carlisle out of Bella's room. From the sound of his thoughts he was somewhat mad that we did not tell him about Bella's suspicions. Well as mad as Carlisle can get. Esme was hurt that we did not tell her and winced at the thoughts coming from her.

When we were out in the hall Carlisle turned to look at us. "Would someone care to explain what is going on?" He asked quietly and we all winced at the undercurrent of anger in his words. Carlisle rarely got mad but when he did it made us feel bad that we made him mad. "Well she is an observant person and noticed our similarities. It's not anything we did." Rose said somewhat defensively. "Why didn't any of you tell us what was going on?" Esme asked. "Well it never exactly came up and we thought we could handle this. We thought she would forget about it." Alice said hesitantly.

Carlisle sighed and ran a hand over his face. He cared about Bella almost as much as I did. Yes I was ready to admit it to myself. I was in love with Bella and the irony of it didn't escape me. I finally fall in love and with a human no less and she is about to die. She doesn't even know how I feel about her. Really she is angry at me. Not that she doesn't have the right I was very rude to her. It was very unlike me but I was so frustrated. I can't read her thoughts and I don't know why. In all of the 107 years I have lived or rather existed as a vampire Bella is the only mind I couldn't read.

Carlisle voice broke through my thoughts. "She won't give up without answers. She is too determined." Carlisle said thinking out loud. "Carlisle, sweetheart, why don't we vote?" Esme said ever the diplomatic one. Carlisle smiled down at her before kissing her softly. "Wonderful suggestion. All those not in favor of Bella knowing what we are raise your hands." I looked at my 'siblings' I was surprised to say the least. I thought that Rose might raise her hand and Jasper but not one hand was up."So we all agree. We will tell Bella what we are." Carlisle said smiling glad that his family wouldn't have to argue about this. Carlisle lead the way back into Bella's room.

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_**Note**_: She also told me to tell you to review because she is not going to put up the next chapter until she has gotten at least five more reviews from her readers. Whatever! Oh and she said "Sorry it's short!" Well, see you!

Ginger =)


	7. Answers

**_Authors Note:_** Next chapter is up Sorry it's short didn't have a lot of time to write it. Oh well. Hope you liked Ginger yesterday. =)

**_Dis-Claim-Her:_** Not SM.

This chapter is dedicated to my homegirl GINGER!!!! Thanks for helping me out yesterday!

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**Save Me**

**Chapter 7**

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I finally managed to sit up while I was waiting for the Cullen's to come back in. My head had just stopped spinning when the Cullen's came back into my room. "Bella I believe that there were some questions that you wanted answered." Dr. Cullen said beaming at me. My heart rate speed up and I saw Dr. Cullen frown at me concerned. "I'm fine," I said, "just excited." Dr. Cullen nodded in understanding."Feel free to ask whatever you want." He said reassuring me.

I sat there in thought for a moment trying to figure out where to start. I finally I took a deep calming breath and asked my first questions. "What are you?" I asked looking at each face. "I do believe I will answer this one." Dr. Cullen said his family nodding in agreement. "Bella this may be a shock." Dr. Cullen warned and I took a deep breath bracing myself for the worst. What was it? Radioactive spiders, kryptonite, an experiment gone wrong?

"Bella, we, as in my family and I, are . . ." He trailed off looking frustrated. "Well, see Bella, we are vampires." He said finally spiting it out. I stared at him waiting for him to say 'Got ya!' When I realized he was serious my eyes widened somewhat and I stared at him my world staring to shut down around me. I was prepared and could handle radioactive spiders, kryptonite and experiments gone wrong but this. . . this I could not handle.

He was a _VAMPIRE_!!!! They were all vampires. I could feel that my breathing was bordering on hyperventilation. I could see his family and him staring at me almost afraid of my reaction. I forced myself to get a grip.

Okay so they were vampires but they couldn't be like evil or anything because they were living with humans. They couldn't live with humans if they ate humans because people would get suspicious of all the people going missing when the Cullen's showed up. So that meant that they weren't evil. I could work with that. I could handle them not drinking human blood.

I took a deep breath and forced myself to hold it before letting it out slowly. "Okay." I said out loud. All the Cullen's looked at as if they were expecting me to start screaming any minute. "Okay, so let me get this straight. You're vampires. All of you." They nodded still looking like they were waiting for the screaming. "Okay," I repeated, "but you're not bad are you?" They all looked at me like I was crazy, even Dr. Cullen. "I mean you could be evil and bad if you wanted to be but your not are you? You try not to be like other like you I assume. What I'm trying to say is that you don't drink human blood do you?" I asked.

It took almost a full five minutes before they stopped looking at me like I was crazy. "No we don't drink human blood. We call ourselves vegetarians because we only drink animal blood instead of human. It's somewhat of an inside joke between us." Edward said smiling a bit, and then he frowned at me. "Bella are you okay?" He asked. "Yes, I'm fine Edward. Why?"I said puzzled. "Bella we just told you that we are vampires and you're okay. The normal human reaction would be screaming, fainting, or fainting screaming and then running." Edward said with a hint of amusement.

"Oh but Edward didn't you get the memo? I'm not a normal human. You see when you have deathly brain cancer growing in your head you tend to be a little physiologically messed up." I said sweetly with an innocent smile. Alice started giggling uncontrollably while all the other Cullen's stared at me shocked that I just joked about having brain cancer. "Oh we are going to get along sooooooo well!!" Alice squealed out after she stopped giggling. I shrugged I had learned that if you couldn't find a way to deal with the concept of having cancer then you would sink into depression. My way of dealing with was to joke about it. So the questioning continued.

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**_Authors Note:_** Basically the questioning goes on and on and on but she lerns the smae things she learns in the books except she doesn't know Edward loves her yet. If I'm truthful the real reason I didn't type all the questions out was because I was lazy. Whatever. I'm taking a night to myself so sue me. Same deal as last chapter folks five reviews and I'll update but not until I get five reviews. Call me greedy I don't care.

Love you!

Kate =)


	8. Visitors

**_Authors Note:_** Hello everyone! I finally got a chapter written. I want to thank you all for being so understanding. I love you all!

**_Disclaimer:_**If I was SM do you think I would be writing this on Fanfiction. No I would be selling it for money! I don't own Apple or Mac either but I do own my iPod! So ha! Take that.

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**Save Me**

**Chapter 8**

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I sighed and sat my book down on my lap. I was still at the hospital. I was having my first and only dose of chemotherapy tomorrow, just before my surgery. Dr. Cullen, he insisted that I call him Carlisle, and I discussed my treatment and had agreed that we couldn't risk waiting for more than one dose of chemo before surgery. This surgery was to remove the most dangerous of my tumors, the ones that were threatening to make my mind collapse.

I lifted my head up, face breaking into a smile as I heard my hospital door open. Ever since the Cullen's had told me that they where vampires at least two of them, other than Carlisle, came to visit me every day and of course my mom came every day but I always managed to get her to go home and relax. I don't know how though. Edward almost always came to see me; he was becoming somewhat of a regular visitor. He rarely spoke but I learned to savor the sound of his voice when he did. Words couldn't do the sound of his voice justice. It was like a whole orchestra playing at once, forming the most wonderful of sounds. Loath as I was to admit it to myself I had fallen in love with Edward Cullen. In just two weeks almost I had gone from strongly disliking someone to being completely head over heels for him.

I knew he would never love me back and that was okay. I mean he was a gorgeous, strong, immortal vampire and look at me. I am a sick, fragile, and soon to be dead human. Why in the world would Edward love me back? Simple answer, he wouldn't. So if he won't love me then I will take what I can and if looking at him and hearing his voice is all I will get, then I will take it.

I was brought out of my somewhat depressing thoughts by Alice's now familiar voice singing my name. "Ohhh Beeeelllllaaaa!" I beamed at her. In the short time we had spent together Alice and I had became very close friends. "Hi Alice." "Bella, guess what I have for you." She sang bouncing up and down next to my bed. I wasn't too surprised that Alice had brought me something. She seemed to think that I didn't have enough stuff to keep me entertained and so whenever she came she brought me a gift so to speak.

"Let me guess you brought me a gift. Please tell me you didn't get me another iPod. You already got me an iPod touch, an iPod nano, and an iPod shuffle." I said somewhat exasperated. Another thing about Alice's 'gifts' was that she didn't let you refuse them and she didn't get you a return receipt, therefore you were stuck with whatever she bought. Alice pouted at my iPod comment before returning to bouncing up and down like an excited three year old.

"Nope not an iPod! It's better than that. It's bigger and shinier and you can do more things with it. Guess Bella!" She said entirely too cheerful for such a tiny person. "Alice I honestly have no idea what you got me and really I'm a little afraid to know." I said a little wearily. "Party pooper." Alice muttered before calling over her shoulder to whoever was still in the hallway. "You can bring it in!"

Again the door opened and there was my Edward. I mean uhhh, Edward. Not my Edward, just Edward. I managed to tear my eyes away from his beautiful face to see that he was holding a box. I frowned at it as he sat it down on the tray in front of me. "Well are you going to open it?" Alice asked. "Alice I don't think that Bella should be-" Edward started. Was that concern held in his voice? I dismissed the thought.

"Oh hush." Alice said interrupting him. I found the top of the medium sized box and pealed the tape off before lifting the top. I was met with white Styrofoam. I lifted it up and it revealed a sleek white hard surface with the Mac Apple symbol in the middle. I stared at it puzzled. "Alice, what is this?" Alice sighed and rolled her eyes. "Honestly Bella you need to watch more TV. It's the new Mac Notebook!" "The what?" I asked still unsure as to what it was. "It's the newest laptop from Mac." Alice said giving up. "Oh." I said staring at her shocked.

She bought me a laptop. This overly hyper crazy pixy who I had known for about five days (that I was conscious for) bought me the newest laptop, with her money. What strange universe was I living in? Let me guess next Edward will be telling me that he loves me. Yeah right!

I blinked rapidly before smiling at Alice. "Thank you Alice but you didn't have too." I said opening my arms for a hug. I had learned that it was better to grin and bear Alice's gifts. If it made her happy it made me happy. Alice beamed back and rushed to give me a hug. "Ohh but Bella I did have too! The computer that you had was really an old piece of medal and it wasn't doing anything for you." I ignored the comment about my computer and let go of her.

"You know I love you right Alice?" I asked. Alice beamed at my comment. "I know! I mean I do see the future after all." If she would have said that a few days ago I wouldn't have believed it. In fact a few days ago I didn't believe it and made Alice prove it to me. Then of course there was Edward and his crazy power to read minds, and Jaspers power of controlling emotions. I was a little shocked to say the least and even more shocked when Edward said that he couldn't read my mind and that I was the only person he couldn't read.

Alice quickly started chatting about something she saw when she went shopping. I wasn't really paying attention. No I was looking at my own personal Greek God, Edward. Edward was sitting in a chair looking out the window. His bronze hair perfectly messy, his eyes warm amber and his features more relaxed than I had ever seen them.

I was brought out of my thoughts as I heard his voice interrupting Alice and her chatter. "Alice, could I talk to Bella alone please." He said not looking at her. Alice immediately got a blank look on her face which I had learned meant that she was having a vision. As soon as the look had come it was gone replaced with a gigantic smile. "Ohhhhhh! So you're going to tell her! Don't worry Edward everything will be fine! Ohh this is so great!" Alice squealed bouncing up and down like before.

Edward sighed in exasperation. "Yes, Alice, I'm telling her if you would leave." Alice pouted when she heard she had to leave before rushing over to give me a hug. "Bye Bella!! I'll see you tomorrow I promise." She said. "I don't know if seeing me tomorrow is such a good idea. I'm going to feel awful. I have chemotherapy tomorrow." I said a little hesitantly. Alice frowned. "I'm your friend Bella and I'm coming over tomorrow so I can help my friend feel better." Alice said determination coloring her voice. "Thank you Alice." I said with tears in my eyes.

Alice gave me one more hug then winked at Edward before quickly leaving. The room was silent for a few moments neither of us speaking. Finally Edward sighed before moving over to sit on the edge of my bed. My breathing hitched. This was the closest we had ever been. My hand was only centimeters from his and his leg was almost touching mine through the hospital blanket. Edward turned his head to look at me and I stared into his eyes. They were the deepest amber I had ever seen and breath was taken away from me. "Bella breath." Edward said with a hint of the crooked smile I loved so much. I drew in a ragged breath. "Bella, I need to tell you something." Edward said gently.

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**_Authors Note:_**MWAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA! Evil Cliff-hanger! I need to do something to keep you people coming back!

Love you,

Kate


	9. His Angel

Authors Note: Sorry I didn't update in so long but I have been kind of depressed because I didn't get into the summer program that I wanted. Oh, well. So will Edward tell Bella or will he not? That is the question! And it will be answered! Here is the next chapter enjoy.

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Save Me

Chapter 9

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EPOV

"Bella, I need to tell you something." I said gently. I looked into her warm chocolate brown eyes bracing myself to tell her the truth. I opened my mouth. "Bella, I lo-" I stopped mid sentence as I saw Bella's eyes roll into the back of her head and she started to seize. In that moment I felt as though my undead heart suddenly started pounding out of my chest.

I quickly stood up running to the door and nearly ripping it off its hinges. Luckily a nurse was only a little ways down the hallway. "NURSE!!!" I yelled. Startled she turned around. "She is having a seizure!" I said panicking. "Who's having a seizure?" She asked calmly as she rushed towards me. "Room 208." I said as the panic started to set in more. She rushed into the room moving very fast for a human. I ran as fast as I could with human eyes on me.

I entered the room to see that the nurse had moved Bella's bed so that it was lying flat and that she was holding Bella's head firmly to keep it from thrashing around. I was so focused on Bella I didn't realize Carlisle was coming until he burst through the door. He ignored me going straight over to Bella. He held her legs down as he talked to the nurse.

"How long has she been seizing?" He asked as calmly as he could. The nurse shook her head. "I don't know. He came rushing down the hall to tell me and when I came in she was still seizing." The nurse was trying as hard as she could to keep Bella's head still and she was doing a good job. I watched the scene almost paralyzed in fear.

"Edward!" Carlisle called finally getting my attention. I looked up at him, tearing my eyes away from Bella. "How long has she been seizing?" He asked keeping my attention on him. "A-About three minutes." I stuttered. I saw a frown mar Carlisle face. Suddenly Bella stopped moving the heart monitor flat lining before it picked up again going double time. Slowly the nurse and Carlisle let go of her. Bella's heart rate started to go back to normal.

I let out air I didn't even know I was holding. Carlisle walked over to the nurse whispering something to her. She nodded before quickly walking out of the room. I was too focused on Bella to care what they were saying. Carlisle stepped in front of me blocking my Bella from my line of sight. I looked into his face and knew something was wrong.

I could have read his thoughts but I need to have this conversation out loud. I needed to hear it. Carlisle spoke, "I have them prepping an O.R. right now. She needs emergency surgery. I thought we had more time. I thought that we could wait until at least one round of chemo was done but I guess not." He paused turning around to look at Bella. "Why do I keep making mistakes? If Bella would have died just then it would have been my fault. I can't have my mistakes being the cause of your love's death Edward. I just can't. I don't think I should be on her case anymore."

Carlisle's words snapped me out of my haze. "It wasn't your fault Carlisle. You knew this could have happened but you just didn't know if it would. Nobody could have predicted this. You need to be on her case. I don't trust anyone but you to do this surgery. I need you to do this."

Carlisle nodded. _I will do it. You know I will do it. She brings you life I didn't know you had. You might want to go tell everyone at home, I'll call Renee. _Carlisle said through his thoughts before leaving the room. I walked slowly over to my Bella. I took her limp hand in mine and sat softly next to her. I kissed the back of her hand before brushing a few strands of hair off her face.

Oh how I loved this fragile human. This love of mine is so irrational. Then again, can't it be argued that love is supposed to be irrational and heartbreakingly wonderful? So many times I have warred with myself about this concept. I keep telling myself I should leave, that I'm no good for her, that I'm too dangerous for her. Time and time again I lose and give in to stay with her.

I need her. She is my equivalent to a human's heart. Their hearts are so fragile but so strong at the same time and without them they wouldn't be able to survive. Without her I wouldn't be able to exist. So I stay and watch as this disease that she has slowly wastes her away. I will take whatever time I can get with this beautiful angel of mine but it will never be enough.

I sigh softly getting up before walking out of her room and to my car all the while listening to the slow, almost too slow, beat of my beloved angel's heart. As of right now I can only see one way of saving her. She would have to become one of us. I wanted her to stay human though, not because I didn't want her for eternity but because I didn't want her to become a monster like me. So I will continue to hope that she will pull through and fight this disease.

I will pray to God for her health. I know that he should not grant me my prayers seeing that I have broke almost every one of the ten deadly sins but maybe he will because he would be saving someone with a kind loving heart. So I will pray and hope that she gets better.

I snapped myself out of my thoughts. I quickly realized that I was in front of our house. I slowly got out of the car. Knowing Alice she would have seen me coming home so the family was probably all in the living room. Sure enough I walked in and there they all were looking at me. Seeing the expression on my face they all immediately asked what was wrong.

I cleared my throat and if I could I would be crying. "Bella had a seizure and they are doing emergency surgery." I said too worried to beat around the bush. Everyone stared at me in shock. Alice shook her head frantically. "No, no, no! That's not true Edward! I would have seen it." Alice said. She had become very attached to Bella over the past few days. "I was there Alice. It happened right in front of my eyes. I said as gently as; I could I knew how much she loved Bella.

Alice now had her head pressed into Jaspers chest, her body shaking from her dry sobs. I could see him trying to calm her but it being ineffective due to his great amount of grief also. Esme had her hand over her mouth looking like she wanted to cry and Rose was in the same position as Alice. For once I didn't see a smile on Emmet's face or hear a joyful thought from him. All I heard was worry for Bella. I sank into the seat closet to me my thoughts revolving around my Bella, my beautiful, beautiful angel.

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Authors Note: Done. I know I'm evil; I shouldn't have made her have a seizure, blah, blah, blah. Well you know what if you have a problem with it get over it because I don't write the characters they write themselves! In this chapter Bella was all like 'I should have a seizure here', I told her no but she didn't listen! So if you want to yell or through rotten food at someone through it at her! –points to Bella-


	10. Waiting

**_Authors Note:_**WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!! Ten chapters finally! -Jumps around like a crazy (crazier) person- Of course Ginger decides just then that she was going to walk in. She started looking at me weird until I reminded her about what she was doing the other night. Then she just walked away! I swear normal people are just so weird! Whatever

Disclaimer: If ya'll think I'm SM you need to come and join me in the insanity ward that I am in. I was put here by Ginger! But I don't see why? I mean so the voices in my head are a little annoying but every author gets used to them after a while! (Just Kidding)

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EPOV

I don't when or how we got into the waiting room at the hospital. All I know is that last time I checked the time was 2:30am and the clock now read 4:30am. The surgery was taking too long, something must have gone wrong. What if my Bella, my sweet angel had di-. NO! I cut that thought process off. I looked around the waiting room trying to distract myself.

Alice was sitting by Jasper with a blank look on her face. She had been looking for Bella's future almost nonstop since she heard about the seizure. It was frustrating her that she couldn't see anything because Bella's future wasn't decided by a decision that was being made. Emmet was sitting by Jasper with an arm around Rose who was sitting next to him. I listened in on his thoughts. He too was trying to distract himself from his worrying thoughts about Bella. Esme was sitting next to me. I could hear in her thoughts that she was praying for Bella's well being. It touched how much they cared about my angel.

I heard the door open and looked up. Seeing who it was I straightened up in my seat. By now Rose, Emmet, Jasper, Alice, Esme and I were all looking at Carlisle as he walked through the waiting room towards us. I tried to listen to his thoughts but he was doing a good job of keeping them hidden. He stopped in front of us a grave expression on his face.

"How is she Carlisle?" Esme asked. "She's . . . stable." He said hesitantly. The way Carlisle said it had me immediately on edge. "What do you mean she's stable? You make it sound like she shouldn't be stable." I said a bit of my panic seeping into my voice. Carlisle grimaced. "To be honest she shouldn't be stable. We had some . . . complications." "What kind of complications?" I demanded. "Well the tumor was even bigger than we had thought and after we had removed it her heart started to have some issues. We had to restart her heart once."

I sat there staring at him in total shock. They had to restart her heart. That meant that her heart stopped. She was stable though. That meant she was going to be okay. Right? "Please tell me she is going to be okay Carlisle." I begged him wanting some good news for a change. "Edward, we don't think she is going to wake up. Part of the complication was that there was some small bleeding in the brain. We don't know how much if any damage was done to her brain." Carlisle said voice thick.

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**_Authors Note: _**I do believe it is time for my evil laugh! MAWHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! HA! Yeah I'm evil because the dark side has yummy cookies! As I have said before I don't write the story! The characters write the story so if you're looking for someone to blame then blame one of them! -points upward to characters- Remember no flames or rants about my crazyness/inasnityness/weirdness/or-possible-drunkenness because the voices in my head don't like it! Okay sorry for all of the above but I'm a little crazy right now I haven't slept in almost 48 hours now because I have a major project (my teachers are evil!) I'm trying to finish but I keep getting distracted! OHHHHHHH SHINY THINGS!! -walks away to look at pretty shiny sparkle thing-


	11. Love

I walked slowly behind Carlisle as he led me to her room in the ICU. Just outside the door he stopped. "I'm so sorry, Edward. I tried everything I could." Carlisle whispered not looking at me. I nodded stiffly and walked into her room, and there she was. My beautiful angel was lying on the bed, her head was wrapped in white gauze and all of her hair was gone. Her arm had an IV in it and her skin was the palest I had ever seen it. Still with all of that Bella seemed like the most beautiful person in the world to me.

I felt my undead heart constrict with pain, I had never gotten to tell her that I loved her. Now she might never know. I had no right to feel this love for her, I was a monster, I had killed people and things mercilessly and yet I still I felt this love for her. Maybe this was my punishment from God for all my sins. Maybe I was destined to fall in love and then have my love ripped cruelly away from me.

I shook myself out of my thoughts; this wasn't about me it was about Bella. I walked slowly over to her side and sat down on the bed next to her. I gently took her hand in mine and threaded our fingers together. I lent down and rested my forehead against hers. I took in her wonderful scent; I found it as sweet as always. I needed to tell her, even if she couldn't hear me; I needed to tell her I loved her.

"Oh Bella, my sweet, sweet Bella. I love you so much that it's indescribable Bella and you need to wake up because I can't live without you. You have to wake up Bella." I whispered my voice cracking on the last sentence. I kissed her forehead softly. "You're my life." I whispered softly.

I then heard the most glorious thing in my entire existence; I heard my angles voice. "Edward?" She whispered weakly. "Oh Bella." I whispered before dry sobbing. She was okay. I pulled myself together I needed to get Carlisle. "Bella I'll be right back." I said. I didn't wait for an answer before going out into the hall. I saw him down the hallway at the desk working on paper work. "Carlisle!" I called down the hallway. He turned to look at me a weary expression on his face. "She's awake!" I said before a gait smile broke out on my face. She was awake!

Carlisle came running down the hall; I got out of his way as he came into the room. Bella was on the bed eyes half open, she seemed to still be under the effects of the anesthesia. Carlisle immediately went over to her and checked to make sure if there was any brain damage. He turned to like at me a light in his eyes I hadn't seen since before the surgery.

"It's remarkable; she doesn't have any brain damage at all." He said amazed a dazed look on his face. "I'm going to go tell everyone the good news." I nodded before going back to Bella. I took her hand in mine again. Bella smiled sleepily. "Edward?" She asked. "Yes?" What was it that she wanted to know? "Do you really love me?" She asked. I stared at her a long moment. "Yes I do. I love you more than anything." I said passion in my voice. She smiled again her eyes still half closed. "You want to know something?" She asked sleepily. "What?" I asked a little puzzled by her behavior; she just found out a vampire loves her and she's smiling. "I love you too." She said before sighing contently and falling back asleep.

I stared at her in complete shock. She loved me. I kept repeating it in my head not quite believing it. I heard the door open and the whole family come in. Esme saw my expression and asked what was wrong. " She . . ." I trailed off still in shock. "She what?" Rose asked confused. "She . . . loves . . . me." I said slowly testing the sound of it. Saying it out loud seemed to make something click in my mind. "She loves me!" I exclaimed beaming at them.

Esme and Carlisle beamed back at me happy I finally found someone. Slowly a smile formed on Rosalie's and Emmet's faces. "Eddie finally got a girlfriend." Emmet teased. I rolled my eyes. "I knew it!" Alice all most shrieked before bouncing up and down all ready planning a wedding. Jasper was smiling the biggest due to all the emotions flowing in the room. One thing kept repeating in my mind over and over: She loved me, she really loved me. With that I knew we could make it everything was going to be fine because we had each other.


	12. Fluff!

_**AUTHORS NOTE: **_Hello everyone! I want to announce right now that in 8 days I will be leaving for three weeks and I don't know if I will have any computer access so I won't be able to post anything. I will be writing while I am away if I get the time but I don't think I will be able to post. Therefore I am giving the warning now that I will be MIA for at least three weeks if not longer.

Okay moving on, I want to give a shout out to all my lovely reviewers. I also want to thank everyone who has put me on their favorite and alert lists! Every one of you who even read my story ROCKS!!!!! YOU PEOPLE ARE AWSOME!!!!!!!!!! Now the show must go on no matter how awesome you girls (and some guys) are so here is chapter twelve.

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It had been a week since I had woken up from my surgery and found out Edward loved me. My life was perfect, well as perfect as it could be when you had deadly brain cancer, no hair and a dose of chemotherapy on the way; but it was perfect all the same. I smiled brightly as Edward opened the door with a hand behind his back. In a couple of hours I was going to have my first dose of chemotherapy and while I felt some apprehension about it I wasn't focused on it, at least not when Edward was in the room. I had nicely asked Edward to go get me something to eat so I would have something on my stomach before I had the chemo. I had learned from experience that it was better to eat before than after.

I was expecting Edward to go down to the cafeteria and grab me something but apparently he had other ideas. Smiling Edward told me to close my eyes, and with growing excitement I quickly followed orders. "Okay you can open them." He said softly and I could feel his breath on my cheek. I opened my eyes to see Edward's deep amber eyes staring straight into mine.

I suddenly felt as though all of my breath had been stolen from my lungs and I could hear the heart monitor start to beep a little faster. Slowly Edward leaned in a little farther and lightly pressed his lips to mine. I carefully pressed mine into his; I had learned in the few short days we had been together that it was better to let Edward lead the kiss because I tended to get a little . . . carried away. Regretfully Edward pulled back. "You seem to be getting better at that." I whispered my breathing a bit ragged. Edward beamed at me happy about his accomplishment. "Sooo, what did you bring me to eat?" I asked curiously as my stomach rumbled a bit.

Edward moved his head out of the way and I saw a plain white bag. This, giving me no clue as to where he went, was entirely useless to me. Sitting up in the hospital bed I peeked into the bag. In the bag I saw my favorite food to have right before chemo. I turned to Edward and threw my arms around him. I heard him laugh. "How did you know?" I asked him as I pulled away. He just smiled. "I have my sources."

I stuck my tongue out at him before picking up the Wendy's frosty and salad. I quickly ate my food every now and again throwing a shy glance and smile toward Edward. I felt his hand clasp mine and I looked up to see him looking out of a window with a smile on his face. Finished eating I put the trash back into the bag. Seeing that Edward hadn't noticed that I was done, I lifted up our intertwined hands and lightly kissed the back of his hand. Edward turned his head to look at me.

"I love you." I said softly. Edward face lit up as if the heavens themselves where shinning down on him as he heard me say those words just like every other time I had said them. I would say those words every minute of every day as long as I got to see him smile each time. "I love you, too." He whispered back and I smiled softy.

I was still in shock. How could this wonderful being love me the weak, sick, breakable human? I wasn't going to question him though; if it made him happy to be with me then I would be happy as well. I might not understand it but I would be happy with it. Just then a nurse came in ruining the happy moment. I looked towards her and she announced that it was time for my chemo.

I nodded and swung my legs over the side of the bed. I gripped Edwards hand for support and pushed myself up off the bed. I let the blood rush back into my legs before I started to walk towards the door. Edward went to let go of my hand when we reached the door but I grabbed back on to it. "Oh no you don't." I said. Edward looked at me confused. "I thought you didn't want me to go with you." He said. "Yeah, well, I changed my mind." I said weakly.

I was scared. It wasn't until a couple of hours after the chemo that it got bad but I still wanted Edward there with me. Understanding Edward intertwined our fingers again. Sighing at the feel of his cold hand on my sweaty palm, I continued to walk towards the room where the chemo would be administered. As long as I had Edward everything in my world was perfect.

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_**AUTHORS NOTE:**_ I know it's a little short and there was more to it but it wasn't finished so I cut that off and will use it for next chapter. I just really wanted to get something out before I had to leave. So review, add me to favorites or alert whatever!!! Love ya all!!! Kate =)


	13. I Hate My Life Maybe

_**Authors Note: **_I am so sorry everyone!!! I logged on to Fan-fiction and looked at my stories and nearly had a heart attack. I couldn't believe that I didn't posting anything for this story in over three months. I thought that I had surly put something up but it seems as though I hadn't. I am terribly sorry about that but time just seemed to get away from me. My life just suddenly exploded into this hectic crazy unorganized mess. I have very little free time now. I am working two jobs, going to school full time and trying to make sure that I still get to sleep sometime. My update will be very erratic on all my stories but I will write when I can. I want to give a HUGE thank you to everyone who is still with me and diligently reading this story. I love you all!!!!

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_I hate my life._ I thought for what must have been the billionth time in the past hour as my stomach tried to force its way up my throat and into the bucket that was being held up in front of my face. I collapsed back into the hospital bed as my stomach unclenched itself. That was the fourth time I had gotten sick in just an hour.

"Mom," I gasped out my eyes closed, "I think this makes a new record." I felt my mom gently squeeze my hand, "I don't think so you where a lot worse the very first time." She replied quietly. "Mom?" I asked as I cracked my eyes open. "Yes sweetie?" "Can you go get Edward? Please?" I beg. I had sent him out of the room an hour ago thinking that I wouldn't get sick until later but I needed him. I needed his cool hand on my sweaty forehead, his gentle touch brushing back my hair and his sweet scent keeping me calm. My mom smiled softly and nodded.

I shut my eyes as she walked towards the waiting room. I was so tired. Not 'I stayed up all night' kind of tired but bone deep tired as if all the energy had just been sucked out of my body. Even though I was wavering on the edge of sleep I seemed to be more aware of everything around me. I could hear the nurses and doctors walking down the hall, the opening and closing of doors, and the fait hum of electricity. The beeping of the heart machine that was once so annoying has now become a slight comfort though all these weeks in the hospital. It meant that my body wasn't giving up on me, that my heart refused to stop; like it was determined to pound away in my chest no matter what, which was good. But still all I could think was that I _hated_ my life. Not enough to kill myself but enough to throw this pity party.

I sighed softly as I felt a cool hand caress mine. _Edward; _my entire body seemed to recognize him as it immediately melted into a puddle. I scooted over in my bed making more room for him before pulling softly on his hand. I was too tired to speak, to even open my eyes but I wanted Edward with me; holding me as I slept. Edward seemed to understand and crawled into bed with me, carefully arranging me around him so that my head was tucked under his and the blanket was a firm cocoon around me keeping me warm. I snuggled into that rock hard chest as he started to hum the most beautiful piece of music I had ever heard. I would have cried at the emotion behind it if I had had the energy.

Slowly I drifted off into the land of dreams. This had to be my favorite place, it was perfect here. There was nothing here; no cancer, no dead dad, no problems, no reason to hate my life. There were just rolling hills covered in all kinds of flowers and soft grass, sunshine that seemed to welcome you, puffy clouds that could provide hours of entertainment and the newest edition: my Edward. My angel, my everything. He seemed to glow in the afternoon sun, making the beautiful flowers and hills pale in comparison. He was always at the top of the second hill on the right arms held out, waiting for me to join him. I would run to him, the grass tickling my feet and when I would reach him he would pick me up and spin. He and I would laugh and I would marvel at the melody that seemed impossible to make with just vocal chords alone.

I shifted slightly, sighing in disappointment as I was rudely awoken from my perfect dream. I sat there in between awake and sleep. You know the place where only thoughts exist, and at the moment I was pondering making the phrase 'I hate my life' my new mantra. Before I could decied someone broke through my thoughts, talking none too quietly and quite angrily. I opened my eyes and frowned just realizing that Edward was no longer holding me. My frown deepened as I saw Edward being scolded quiet harshly by a rather haughty looking nurse. He seemed to be annoyed but had kept his lips in a tight line as though to keep himself from saying something rude. Seeing that she wasn't going to let up on him anytime soon and neither of them had noticed that I was now awake I discreetly pressed the doctor call button.

Smirking somewhat mischievously I waited for Carlisle to some through the door. Sure enough not two minutes later Carlisle walked in. He stopped as he heard the ruckus being made by the nurse and frowned looking at me. I winked and nodded to Edward and then the nursing, silently telling him to save Edward. He quickly nodded back before clearing his throat loudly to get their attention. The nurse turned, her face lighting up as she saw him a dark twinkle in her eye as she looked at Edward.

"Dr. Carlisle, I think that we a problem here. This… hooligan was clearly breaking hospital rules. He was lying in bed with the patient. He had the nerve to hush me as I informed him of the rules." The nurse said in a nasally voice looking at Edward arrogantly. The nurse opened her mouth to continue but Carlisle interrupted her. "That hooligan as you called him would be my son, Amanda." Carlisle said lightly.

Amanda flushed a bright tomato red. "Edward was bringing comfort to his girlfriend after a dose of chemotherapy and most likely shushed you for speaking to loudly. He most probably wanted her to rest. Amanda I don't believe Ms. Swan here is even your patient therefore she is not your top priority. While you were in here bickering with my son Mr. Sander missed his dose of pain medication that you where supposed to administer. I suggest that you go do that." Carlisle said somewhat icily. I heard 'Amanda' mumble something before quickly walking from the room.

"Thank you Carlisle." I said softly still tired. He smiled and nodded before leaving the room. I shivered suddenly freezing and snuggled into the blankets. "Cold?" Edward asked concern laced through his voice. I nodded, shivering again. "I'll go get you another blanket." Edward said heading for the door. "Edward," I called softly, "I love you." It was worth the energy to see Edwards face light up the concern for me momentarily wiped from his face. "I love you too." He replied before going into the hallway in search of another blanket.

I relaxed into my pillows shifting till I was lying on my side. I brought my knees up trying to bring some heat into my child body. I lazily shut my eyes, escaping back into my perfect little world. Maybe I didn't hate my life, after all I had Edward.

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**_Authors Note: _**So we get a glimps of what Bella is like after chemo. It seems that it makes her a little moody, but that's okay. This chapter is wrote a little differently then from what I normally do. At least I think so but maybe not. Anyways sorry it's so short I just wanted to get somethign out to you girls (and guys). Let me know what you think!!!


	14. Bad Dreams

**Authors Note:** I have no excuse except for that life sucks sometimes! But I'm not abandoning this story what so the ever, which leaves me here posting this! Enjoy!! By the way my reviewers are AMAZING!!!! 80 REVIEWS!!!!!!!

_**IMPORANT!**_ Now that I have your attention I would like to make an announcement. I am looking for someone to beta read this story for me! If you are interested PM me or when you leave a review just let me know! Thank you!!

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing. =(

"Speaking"

_Dream or emphasis_

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_Dream_

"_Bella?" I turned around in the darkness looking for the person calling my name. Trees suddenly started forming through the darkness around me. I was in a clearing, the grass illuminated by the sun shining brightly over head. "Hello?" I called into the forest. Edward appeared in front of me his skin sparkling like diamonds. Something was wrong with him though, his eyes normally golden colors were now black and his face was deceptively calm. "Edward?" I asked a little puzzled. Edward just stared off into the forest as if he didn't hear me. "Edward?" I heard myself question again. Edward looked into my eyes this time and I flinched, they had turn blood red. Suddenly we were standing on a cliff that overlooked a raging ocean. The bright sun had turned into a roaring storm and lightning illuminated the sky. Edward's eyes where illuminated in the flash of light and I stumbled backwards from him, they had gone pitch black. Suddenly a huge deafening roll of thunder boomed above my head and the heavens opened up pouring down rain. "Goodbye, il mio amore bello."(1) Edward whispered softly before turning and running off the edge of the cliff. "EDWARD!" I screamed out in terror. _

I yanked my eyes open and sat straight up, chest heaving as I gasped for breath. EDWARD! I thought panicked. "Bella?" someone asked. "Bella is everything okay?" I looked around the room wildly searching for the speaker. I saw Carlisle clipboard in hand staring at me cautiously. I took me a moment to realize that Carlisle was actually here. "Carlisle!" I half way screamed, "Where's Edward?!" I demanded. Carlisle looked far too calm; didn't he know that Edward just threw himself off a cliff?! "Bella, Edward is at home. The family needed to get something to eat and I sent your mom home to sleep. Edward should be back any minute now." He replied in his best calm doctor mode voice.

I breathed a little slower in relief, "So Edward didn't commit suicide and jump off a cliff?" I asked just to make sure. Carlisle chuckled a bit. "No Bella. It would take more than jumping off a cliff for a vampire to kill themselves, humans got the better end of that deal." Carlisle replied a bit grimly. I frowned in confusion; I had never seen this side of Carlisle before. "What makes you say that?" I asked a little hesitantly, I didn't want to pry. Carlisle smiled to reassure me. "I tried it when I had first been turned. I thought committing suicide would surely be better than killing humans. Vampires cannot drown, for they need no air, poising does not work due to our venom and throwing them off a cliff would do more than tickle a bit." I sat still as a statue absorbing this information.

I sat in the comfortable silence that was broken by the beeping of the many machines in the room and Carlisle's pen gliding over the paperwork on the clip board. Every now and again he would glance over at one of the many machines I was connected to.

The sound of the door opening broke the silence. I looked over at the door to see Edward smiling at me. I smiled back weakly still not completely over the terror my dream had instilled in me. Edward's smile transformed into a frown as he studied my weak smile. "What's wrong?" He asked gently as he walked into the room.

I moved over on the bed and patted the now empty space next to me. He lay down next to me and I cuddled into him laying my head on his chest and listened to the air moving in and out of his lungs. I noticed that Carlisle had left, as I rested my head on his chest. "What's wrong?" he asked again as he softly rubbed one of my arms. "Can you promise me something?" I asked my softly. The hand that was rubbing my arm stopped, and I whined in protest. "That depends." Edward replied.

I frowned. "Please Edward never through yourself off a cliff." I begged him still a little rattled over my dream. Edward chuckled, "No worries love, I am quite durable and falling off a cliff wouldn't hurt me at all." My frown deepened, he had to promise me this. "And Edward don't you ever dare try to kill yourself!" I said firmly. Edward was silent for a while. "I can't promise that Bella. I refuse to live in a world where you don't exist." Edward finally said softly.

I was silent trying to come up the best argument to this. "Would you want me to kill myself if something where to happen to you?" I asked. "No! Absolutely not!" Edward said horrified at even the idea. "Exactly! I don't want you to kill yourself over me! Let's face it Edward, just because this one tumor is almost gone means _nothing!_ I'm not out of the woods yet and I won't be for a while." I said frankly.

I had had to think about death very often seeing as how it was very possible that I could be healthy one minute and the next cold as stone, that's the way it is with cancer. "Don't be silly Bella. You're going to make it out of this just fine." Edward whispered to me as he continued to rub my arm soothingly.

I sighed in frustration and got up off his chest, he wasn't getting it. I leaned on one arm on my side so that I could look at him. "No Edward I am not going to make it through this! I'm not being silly okay. I have been through this before, over and over again and it feels different this time! Edward I _feel_ it! Every single day it's there lingering in the corner of my mind…" I trailed off and looked away from him. He didn't say anything so I continued in a whisper, "It's different this time. I'm going to die. They say that cancer patients always know when it's time and Edward it's here. I don't know how long I have it could be a week or a month but it's not long. So please Edward," I looked at him with tears in my eyes, "Please promise that you won't go and kill yourself."

For a long moment he just looked at me as my tears ran down my face. Before gently gathering me in his arms as he cradled me to his chest. "I promise, love." He whispered softly in my ear as he held me. And then everything overwhelmed me and I cried. As I cried Edward held me whispering sweet nothing in my ear before finally humming a lullaby. Finally warm comforting blackness claimed me.

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**Authors Note:** So there it is! A little short but hey it's done! Now as of when I am posting this story I have 80 reviews (ya'll are AWESOME!!!) but I love my reviews soooo I'm giving you an incentive! For the 90th reviewer I will write you a one shot! It must be a Twilight one shot with Twilight characters and you cannot request anything that will make the rating go above T. Other than that _you _chose the characters, the situation they're whatever you want! It could be pure Edward Bella fluff or a day in the relationship of Alice and Jasper! I'm open to anything! That's your incentive!!! Now go on and REVIEW!!! You know you want too……

Love,

Kate


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